Emotional maturity is a critical factor to any relationship but especially romantic relationships but it is rarely discussed. People ignore the role emotional maturity plays within a relationship because with emotional maturity comes the requirement of being self controlled and responsible for your actions and inactions. But if you’re going to have valueable relationships in your life you’re going to have to develop emotionally.
Often times emotional growth is stunted by traumatic events, emotionally scarring experiences and a lack of training or development within that area. Yet there are ways to grow past your emotional experiences, below are 8 ways to increase your emotional maturity.
#1 Emotional regulation
You can’t control life but you can control how you respond to life. Calculate and process what is in front of you instead of just responding to what’s in front of you. When you take the time to assess the problem and how you WANT to respond to the problem you will address the problem the way you visualize it. Don’t allow circumstances to turn you into an emotional rollercoaster. Process first react second.
#2 Face “it” head on
Identify challenges and face them. As you face challenge after challenge your ability to endure will increase. You will build up what is called a bounce back spirit and be able to handle even the most emotionally tough issues.
#3 Celebrate your strengths
Make a list of the strengths you have as a person. Go through your positive traits, strengths, and abilities. This helps you stay strong in the face of adversity because you can acknowledge the positive things that are within you.
#4 Track your thoughts
Are handling situations in your life, job, marriage etc. overwhelming to you? Use a journal. A journal will allow you to process your feelings, emotions and things that make you happy or even what upsets you. Jot down things like…
- What I want when I’m feeling low is…
- My biggest challenge today was…
- I feel powerless when…
- I want to give up when…
#5 Stay away
Stay away from people, things, behaviors etc. that hinder your mental capacity such as pornography, alcohol, drugs, sex, etc. When your mind is able to stray away but external substances it denotes an inability to deal with the issues that are confronting you. Your emotions are like a muscle. When you keep exercising them they will get stronger but if you keep finding forms of escaping you will become weaker.
#6 Take care of yourself
Exercise releases chemicals in the body and the brain that communicates to it that it is healthy. When the mind thinks its healthy it produces other hormones and chemicals in the body that strengthen you. The stronger your body is the strong your mind and emotions. Drink more water.
#7 Positive affirmations
Use positive affirmations to encourage and build yourself up. You are able to tell your mind and emotions what to do so that they don’t drag you around by using your positive affirmations to build yourself up. The most powerful are the ‘I AM’ affirmations.
- I am powerful.
- I am able to rule over my emotions.
- I am able to deal with the situations that present themselves to me.
#8 Talk to a therapist or counselor
Often times an inability to develop or grow within your emotions is because of hurts, trauma, pains and injustices that occurred within your past. A therapist or counselor will help you process through those events to allow you to enjoy and deal with life in a healthy way. You know its resolved when bad habits, reoccurring themes and the like stop coming up in your life and behavior.